I am so thankful for a twenty-seven-year partnership in ministry and marriage with my husband, Steve. We are privileged to serve in the Department of Christian Formation, working with pastoral staff and volunteers who have been called to children, youth, and family ministry. We are blessed and thankful to have two children, Melissa, a student at North Park Theological Seminary (married to Fredrik Wall, a Swedish citizen), and Paul, a sophomore in high school, both of whom know God and want to serve him. This week, we focus on relationships and how they can nurture healthy and effective spiritual growth.

Sunday, October 12 (Eighteenth after Pentecost) Psalm 31:1-8

Relationships Bring Joy and Strength

I trust in the Lord. I am overcome with joy because of your unfailing love, for you have seen my troubles, and you care about the anguish of my soul" (vv. 6b-7, NLT).

The psalmist tells God, "I am overcome with joy because of your unfailing love." Isn't it amazing that God knows everything about us--our joys, our sorrows, our concerns, our flaws, and our gifts--and he loves us for who we are? Not who we are going to be, not who we were, but who we are today. It is an amazing relationship. I feel so fortunate to have a similar relationship with my husband and best friend.

When we were called to Chicago, we were saddened to leave behind friends and family in ministry. It is difficult to go from church life to an administrative role. I miss the interaction in people's lives. But whenever I feel down God gives me a glimpse back into what is happening in the lives of his people.

Lord, thank you that you are our refuge and strength. Thank you that you are always there to walk beside us on our faith journey. Amen.

Monday, October 13--Psalm 31:9-18

Relationships Are Built upon Trust

But I am trusting you, O Lord, saying, 'You are my God!' " (v. 14, NLT). In 1997, I was in my doctor's office and heard the words, "You have a grotesque tumor the size of a volleyball." It was just weeks before CHIC, the Covenant's triennial youth event. I needed surgery. I had been excited about journeying with students as they experienced God in a new way at CHIC. Instead, I was to stay home.

I remember experiencing peace that passes all understanding (Philip-pians 4:7) just before the surgery. I spent my days praying for CHIC in a different way than I would ever have done if I had been able to attend. I can remember thinking I couldn't wait until CHIC 2K when I would walk beside students and share this faith experience with them face to face.

In verse 15, David says, "My future is in your hands." And in 2000, I was privileged to be with a gifted team of men and women in planning and facilitating CHIC, furthering the relationship I had begun by praying for them three years earlier!

God, thank you that when we give all things to you, you allow us this unbelievable adventure of faith. Amen.

Tuesday, October 14--Psalm 31:19-24

Relationships Give Courage and Hope

So be strong and take courage, all you who put your hope in the Lord!" (v. 24, NLT). Dan Crawford, a missionary in Africa, says that if you say, "My times are in your hands" (v. 15) to someone from the area where he works, they would translate the idea into these gorgeous words: "All my life's whys and whens and wheres and wherefores are in God's hands."

Be strong and take courage--these words were going through my mind on the last few feet up a ridge in Minnesota's Boundary Waters. I was supervising a group of students as we were carrying our canoes over a steep embankment. I was exhausted, worn out, and didn't have one ounce of strength left. But these caring words, quoted by the students, reminded me that if we put our hope in the Lord, all things are possible.

Lord help me to live each day knowing that my whys, my whens, my wheres, and my wherefores are in your hands. Thank you for the friends that remind us to put our hope in you. Amen.

Wednesday, October 15--Mark 9:14-29

Relationships Build Faith in God's Power

What do you mean, if I can?' Jesus asked. 'Anything is possible if a person believes.' The father instantly replied, 'I do believe, but help me not to doubt!'" (vv. 23-24, NLT).

When I come before God in prayer, do I believe he will answer? Do I live my life believing that anything is possible? Do I believe that God cares about who I am and that he is willing to hear my prayers? So many times my focus is on "me" or "I"; what I hope for or desire. When I pray, am I really building my relationship with God? Where is my focus? Lately, God has been teaching me that my focus is to be on God. For the power is not in my prayer, but in God who hears it.

Lord help me to hear your voice, help me to seek after your heart, to put my focus on your will not mine. Amen.

Thursday, October 16--Mark 9:30-37

Relationships Focus on Needs of Others

He sat down and called the twelve disciples over to him. Then he said, 'Anyone who wants to be first must take last place and be the servant of everyone else'" (v. 35, NLT).

Lining up for recess as children, most of us wanted to be first. When picked for a team, we wanted to be selected early. Now that we are older we want be in front--especially in traffic. It is our nature to want to be first, to be picked, and to be noticed for what we have done.

But Jesus tells us to put others first, and to be last instead. I have friends who lives with this kind of servant heart. For them, it is never important who gets credit for the idea or the dream; it doesn't matter whether they receive recognition for the countless hours that they put into making things happen. They serve with a gracious and caring spirit. I want to be more like them.

God, help me to have a servant's heart, help me to see the needs of others. Lord, help me to see with your eyes. Amen.

Friday, October 17--James 4:1-10

Relationships Are Built with Gratitude

And yet the reason you don't have what you want is that you don't ask God for it. And even when you do ask, you don't get it because your whole motive is wrong--you want only what will give you pleasure" (vv. 2b-3, NLT).

Years ago I was visiting with a couple whose four grown children were serving all over the world. I was a new mom, and wondered if it was hard for my friends to be so far from their children. This wise couple explained that their children were a gift from God--they were on loan and belonged to God. They felt privileged to have been entrusted with the care of the children.

This past year I was comforted by my friends' words--our children are a gift from God--as my grown daughter and her husband left for Sweden for their internship. As we said our good-byes we knew it was what God wanted for them.

Lord, help me to have right motives. Help me to reflect you as I share with others all that you have taught me. Help me to have a right spirit within me. Amen.

Saturday, October 18--James 4:11-17

Relationships Require Follow-Through

Remember, it is a sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it" (v. 17, NLT).

These are tough words. How many times do we know what it is God wants us to do but choose not to obey because we think we have a better answer, or we question if we really heard God speak to us.

Our faith is like the life of sailors. They can stay on dry land and never live up to their full potential. Or they can get into the sailboat.

But getting into the boat is just the first phase. We can steer the tiller anyway we want--we get that choice. But the wind gives us direction and smooth sailing. The wind steers us in the right direction. We can fight the wind; we can put our sails down and refuse to use the power the wind provides. But life is so much better when we work with the wind. God is the wind in our sails if we allow him to have control.

Father, thank you that you do guide us and help us to know what is right. Thank you that you gave us Christ as a living example of how to live. Amen.